


I still see her

by robin_orpheus



Category: Stranger Things (TV 2016)
Genre: Friendship, Grief/Mourning, Loss, Nancy Wheeler Misses Barbara "Barb" Holland
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-15
Updated: 2020-07-15
Packaged: 2021-03-04 03:21:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 418
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24946786
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/robin_orpheus/pseuds/robin_orpheus
Summary: Nancy thinks back about her closest friend. And how she'll never see her again.
Relationships: Jonathan Byers/Nancy Wheeler
Kudos: 4





	I still see her

Barb. The name felt foreign to her mouth. Yet it was the name of her best friend since kindergarten. Someone she had spent so many afternoons with. Studying, watching movies, talking. Whatever they did they always did together. But then she’d started hanging out with the “popular” group. By around the time she had started dating Steve, her and Barb began to drift apart. It was her fault that Barb was dead. She was the one who had brought Barb along to Steve’s party. Dead. How had it come to be that way? A part of Nancy felt as if she should have listened to Barb's advice. Never agreed to start dating Steve Harrington. If she had only done things a little bit different maybe things would have turned out differently.

Some nights Nancy still saw her. In her dreams, in hallucinations. Old photos she’d find of her and Barb. The ones that had been up on her walls she had long since torn down. And torn them to pieces. She didn’t want to be reminded of how shitty of a friend she was. She knew that already. No good in reminding herself that over and over again. Though that was what she did. 

It had been around three years since Barb had “disappeared” and died. Her poor parents would never know the truth. Nancy settled down beside Jonathan who was holding the remote and turning the dead-quiet volume up to a loud murmur. On screen was the opening scene of The Fly. 

“You okay?” Jonathan asked, he looked concerned. Always so concerned about everyone except himself.

Nancy only nodded and smiled a bit. 

“Yeah, just thinking.” 

“About her?” 

He had a strange way of knowing how she thought. And then in consideration it was the third-year anniversary of Barb’s disappearance. And she couldn’t help but feel a strange unease grip her. Jonathan wrapped an arm around Nancy and she sunk into the comfort of her boyfriend’s side. 

Nancy nodded.

“I still see her.”

“It’ll get easier”, he promised.

“Yeah.”

Nancy doubted it. It felt impossible to get over the death of her closest friend. Barb had been a part of her. And then to suddenly lose her felt like having one’s limb being ripped off. But she knew that one day, whether it would take a decade or more, she’d eventually be okay. And still, she had the memory of Barb to hold onto. For now, she focused on the movie being played on the small television .


End file.
